Did I Lock My BackDoor?



“Did I lock my back door?”
as we sat ready in the car
“Yes Nan I locked it for you”
Driving along and not that far
“Did I lock the back door?”
I reassured it was secure
“What have you been up to Nan?”
Changing the subject for sure
“Not a lot, haven’t seen anyone”
though I visited the day before
Short memory gone, forgotten
“Did I lock my back door?”

Brain attack, Alzheimer’s, Rotten!

A twenty minute journey
Seemed twenty hours long
with nonsense conversations
Youthful memories were strong
So chat about long gone familiar
to cause less confusion
Speak to the yet undamaged brain
It’s less of an intrusion
Every other weekend away
a pattern of seventeen years
Caused upset, worry, distress
Fraughtness, laughter and tears
“What have you done with my curtains?”
“Mum I think you’ll find They’re mine
you’re in my home now” reassured
Silence, the unfamiliarity sublime
Imposing disease stripping all away
at what makes you, you
Torturing the witnesses
in what they’re going through
We know we need to live in your world
but that’s not rational to our mind
It’s lying and nonsensical
but I know I’m being kind
In sickness and in health
for better and for worse
Mental health, dementia
Call it what you like it’s a curse!
Deny it at your peril
it will get to you in the end
Love it, laugh at it
make it another friend
For now it only stops at death
this we know and no more
I’ts nearly ten years since hearing
“Have I locked my back door”

Dorothy May usher 1.7.1905-4.11.2006
Miss you Nan


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